Stoneflower seeker´s space

Never trust strangers

2006-08-04T01:38:00.000-07:00

You know what happens when you get yourself a landline?
Exactly. You get into the White Pages.
Which, differently to the Yellow Pages, would not link a seeker to something like the Brussels Menopause Centre, but will give out your name, your address and whether somebody else is registered to this number.
So after that one can go to the boiledrabbit.com and proceed.
I am making this up. I do not even know if there is such a thing as boiledrabbit.com
But anyway, if you live here be sure you never ever tell the stangers the district you live in. Because then they just have to know your last name and voila, they can stalk you as much as they please.
With that, back to work

My life as an ADSL hermit

2006-08-03T10:19:00.000-07:00

Hello DAHRLINGS

Here I am, sitting with my ADSL, my landline, my laptop, my printer, my webcam, my two cellphones (one's not working), my webcam, my horny modem (the horns are for wi-fi that I do not use), a radio, a lot of wires and cables and not enough sockets, and all the usual suspects as skype, msn, icq, a firewall, an anti-virus and an ftp programme, last two on free trial of course.

That should make you feel grown-up, serious or businesslike - or anti-social? Yesterday I asked my msn-pal P whether I were to become anti-social because of my ADSL? He said I'd become a HERMIT. Well I would prefer an anti-social, Hermit sounds just like Termit.

The reason to get all this stuff in my little flat was that I am a starting businesswoman - a sort of - you know, one that cannot get a full-time job and runs around to pick contracts. In fact, I was just interrupted by a phone call re: a contract I thought I'd lost.

I had a lunch with a friend who mentioned that a person is about to start in their office because his employer wanted to get rid of them, and not for any other reason. Then I asked maybe I could come too - and she said, nobody wants to get rid of you, that's your problem :).

Whatever. I managed to get as far as create a webspace which is, as my adsl provider explins, a powerful tool for self-marketing. It is an exquisite white page graced with words "under construction".

However, I sort of figured out what I am going to put there. See, I got not one but two letters from our yellow pages insisting I should surrender myself to their catalogue. So I was nonplussed what field I should put myself in. I went to their webpage and checked what they have, and then I started to play with different keywords. And Yes, nothing in my specific field of interest. Maybe I just got lucky?

And then yes I did something vicious. I looked for a person who said he also was an independet and of course his family name shows with a completely different name and address. Yes if you happen to read this it's me and I am talking about you ;). Of course then I searched for the first name and there was a lot, including Brussels Menopause Centre. I thing that's where he truly belongs!

Ok back to work. Wish me luck, darlings.

Finally!

2006-08-02T03:01:00.000-07:00

Here,
finally I got my adsl line
of course, not without a fun story - when an hour had passed since the fixed time of appointment, I called the customers' support, asking where's the technician. I must be very naive and a true bimbo (you know, the type who needs to be told - maybe you have a telephone cable, you just don't see it). The support told me not to worry, because "if the hour of appointment is fixed as XXX, it is simply not true, it means that the techician will come since that hour during the day".

Anyway, hope that everyone'll see more of me on the web,
xox

Stoneflower reincarnated

2006-07-31T00:46:00.000-07:00

Hei
looks like I have been missed :) somebody even tried to get my password, anyway I got a message from the no-reply suggesting I chose the new password... did not look like phising but who said I am an expert? Anyway, my password stays intact, best regards to the suckers
to everybody else - I will not have an I-net connection till Wednesday, hope to see you then
Congratulate me on my new futon, bought for the autumn season about to start ;) catch up with you later

... and miles to go before I sleep

2006-03-02T04:56:00.000-08:00

Eating...
the only job that feeds
I am afraid my tendency to procrastinate has also spread here. Aggie reminded that I was to write about the gender audite. Definitely so - but I have promises to keep - including this one but also another one - but maybe tomorrow I'd get to the audit thing.

Karin's black shirt will likely get back to the owner. Can't wait to get together. Me, I mean - the shirt has not said anything.

Today, there is only one thing for oversharing-
since I announced that I successfully passed a test (which ONLY gives me the right to take another one) to get a Dream Job, I could not help but notice ...how to put it mildly... some turbulence near my body's back door. The problem is that you might think those people are there to kiss up, but in fact they're there for something more passionate - to screw you ... over.
But hey it shows that you are on the right track with your life :D Wish me luck, I'll be studying vigourously the whole March.

And nope, even the coming of Spring does not mean yyou get to read any love-life related entries.
Except for the fact that somebody made me promise that I will never kiss any ducks or chicken again.

You know this song:
I don't want to blog about it how you broke my heart....

Hey it is not a pride thing. Pride is IMHO just a nice way to deal with an issue when you cannot address an issue with dignity and just KNOW you'd turn a psychobitch if you look the problem into the eye.

Nope, it's different

It is just that if you blog about the bloke, then at some point you're either extremely vulnerable or extremely venomous. Like a snake in a cast.
Which means that you would not let the bloke see the blog and understand the brilliance he's been missing out on.

Aggie? Ur professional opinion?

The Spring has finally come!

2006-03-02T04:04:00.000-08:00

It's ten degrees below zero here.
See, just at time when you would think the bird flue killed me, I resurfaced with a new comment. Had to get back to my country - I would name it "the bliss of small things".
Why? Because, from a consumer's point of view, there is just so much more convenience here than in the Heart of Europe

List of great things includes:

The Grand Prix - my dad and brother. We went to watch the Pride and Prejudice together. Ah, they were so sweet to go to this movie with me ;)

Other things...

1) access to enterpreneurship. Honestly you just get to the tax office and get your tax number and that's it. In contast, in my adopted country's climate for solo entrepeneurs more reminds wolf hunting - red tape everywhere and if you're lucky to pass it, then you'd get a priviledge to pay a lot of tax.

1) free or dirty cheap WiFi connenction. In fact, the experiment goes as far as having three villages in the South totally covered. You can do it in the street. Compare to my adopted homecountry, where public WiFi access is rare, unreliable and the price range is from EUR 5 for two hours to a twenner for a 24hour period. I mean here you could surf yourself dead if you absolutely need to spend EUR 5 on it.
Actually, I had a situation maybe three years ago. I was in the South and had no modem cable with me - and nobody did. There was no cable in the hotel at all - and I had to send a file from my own laptop, since I did not have a floppy drive - and nobody had a recordable CD or an USB key. See, I just was ahead of time, leaving the modem cable at home. I thought that WiFi was a basic human right of a hotel guest. And I was in a hurry. Finally I called a taxi to drive me to a nearest hotspot :D and then waited for it back, more or less in my pijamas, in front of the Town Council.
But still it was all cheaper that five euros.

2) paying for public transport with your cellphone. In fact, I would not do it again, since you have to pay extra then. But it is VERY XXI century - you just enter a lot of random numbers and our hi-tech Big Brother knows that you, a man or a woman with this personal identification number, have the right to ride a bus for another hour or two;

3) my new laptop adaptor, which origins from a corner shop and is ten times smaller and lighter than the one that I had to trace in Brussels like I was looking for a holy grail;

4) Father's passion for giving presents - which is sort of difficult to meet, given that I just donated three bags of stuff to OxFam. I got an MP3 recorder though to further encourage my tendency to procrastinate - now I could just speak instead of writing if I get a good idea

Voila, time to eat - see u soon

The reason to drin champers tonight is...

2006-02-27T09:48:00.000-08:00

the nicest message in AGES

I am pleased to inform you that you have obtained sufficient marks in verbal and numerical reasoning tests and that you will be invited to the second phase.... and so on

Everybody that buggered on me that cold December morning - Thanks mates and I love you!
See you in April to bugger on me again for the next phase in temporary EU contract agents selection.

I have to meet a tough deadline so no drinking really. But promise as soon as I get stuff done I´ll get absolutely pissed.

Lots of bimbo talk

2006-02-26T08:41:00.000-08:00

Yep I went to the party. It was good. No pictures again - it was the UGLY CAMERA night. You know sometimes all people you picture look bloated and... was it just my camera or do really All women who think they are very attractive have facial hair looking close up?

Btw check dooce.com. I think she`s fantastic! If you like my blog, you´ll love hers.

Changed my MSN name to "The Bird Flu Importer" (going back to my country for a week). Most of the compatriots in Benelux already had their name changed to High Fever or Ibuprofen. Ibuprofen complained that she could not move her head - 200 little dwarfs stumping there.

Got something done with the little help of my friends - the Oxfam can now have my corset top and this lovely embroidered pink shirt. Along with approximately three bags of other clothes that became too loose on me. I still have some "room for improvement", so hopefully Oxfam will have another chance - now that I found their green solidarity bin near the church I go to. I am not catholic, but I go to this church since the priest is Ok with me coming there "to meditate", or, rather, to meditate. It is that biggish St Paul´s Church in Woluwe St Pierre.

Actually I decided to blog today since I just HAD to say something about the Penguine`s parade. Meaning the President`s reception on the occasion of the national day. Of course some young fashion artist was complaining again that our woman only wear dark colours. Which reminds me of when one of the compatriots HERE, in the heart of Europe, wore a black skirt with pink pinkstripes, everybody complimented on her "daring fashion choice". Seriously.

Maybe the thing is that nobody but the young fashion artists likes bright colours?
I tried to wear an orange scarf yesterday. Most people thought I was either Ukrainian or preparing for Halloween. The truth is - I just have the orange one, the red one and the yellow one, others are unwearable with that dress.

Well, I looked at the pictures http://woman.delfi.ee/varia/persoon/article.php?id=12320472 and saw nothing outrageous. Except for one dress that looks very much like one I bought at the spur of the moment for twelve pounds somewhere on Oxford street. But I would not tell you which one ;)

Back to garlic and honey now.

XOX and thanks for the flu!

2006-02-25T06:47:00.000-08:00

Theme song - Heather Nova's Virus of the mind
you know it - I'm pretty happy - and I don't need your virus of the mind :D

Cheers to Aggie, your blog is so much fun. It's here http://aggiesplace.blogspot.com/
Makes me remember the gender audit we had last June. The highlight - middle-aged men complaining about the pressure from the society to buy male beauty products. My response was (in private of course) - why don't just go and buy it? Made the manliest man outthere reach out to some more mellow colleagues and start explaining (complaining rather) how could he be never interested in a career woman. Which does not explain why he always wants to tease me. But I digress.

Meet the lovely bah-bah-bah Bella -the sheep that mesmerized me yesterday. I swear it was in town. Somewhere near Park des Sources. Kind of reminds me of Kyrgyzstan, where you can see them wandering in the street in front of the standard ugly nine-floor 80th apartment buildings. My Kyrgyz colleagues actually said that you can enjoy the view of a sheep being slaughtered in the yard with your morning coffee, if you live in one of those appartment. People would just keep the sheep on the balcony or in the garage.

And the bird there. Oh yes, we should be extra cautious now. Health authorities specifically ask us to wash our hands more often.

I went to bed yesterday feeling dizzy and woke up absolutely sick - my nose is running, my ears are blocked, my eyes are red and my throat is sore.
Actually I think I managed to establish the origin beyond the reasonable doubt - a mate who was fighting the nasty thing for more than a month.
Think positive! First, it means that I do not have the BIRD FLUE - it is not transferred from human to human. Or it is now - and I will die and be remebered in the medicine history.
Second, it proves that my acquaintance is really having a contagious disease rather than something like Hodgekin (spelling?). My friend's partner was fighting flue for weeks, and then it turned out that it was the very last stage cancer.

Scared?

Do not be, this cancer is curable if detected until the person dies. Therefore he pulled through.

Back to the flu. I think somewhere earlier in the 20th century there were an international movement for simplification of the greeting procedure. To avoid these illness-spreading handshakes. If you know more, I'd be interested. It can come handy.

You see, I am more of a hug person - which is very hygienic. More than a handshake I think. There are other options. A peck on the lips becomes a trust symbol of sorts - your germs are my germs ;) You wanted some affection - now you have an excuse to stay in bed for the whole week-end. Alone.

Actually, I did not, alone or otherwise. I am using the common-sense cures such as cleaning your flat (very good), tea with lemon (that's harder, need to slice the lemon), praying, and a LOT of vitamin C food and garlic. Which is something still in the project - I need to go to somekindofparty later... maybe I'll skip it... but then you'd got to share, and now when I have my virus, I want to share it.

Today we're having a demonstration of sans-papier - undocumented workers. I know they suffer a lot, I even wrote a paper this Autumn, but DAMN these people got LUCKY with weather. Every time I get to go on a demonstration, it's either too cold or raining.
Well, lucky or not, I am not going there. I am going to have a cup of tea with a friend and a walk in the park. I'll let u know if I managed to get the flu to the party or not.

Karin in Wonderland. Magic and torture

2006-02-24T08:25:00.000-08:00

Karin in Wonderland. Magic and torture
That IS one beautiful blog. It is just like going into a verbal art gallery, but without getting tired and bored. And - the pleasure was all mine ;)

Something real

2006-02-24T07:32:00.000-08:00

Theme song: you´ve changed... you´re not the angel I once knew... sung by many

The Belgians!

How dare they taking the national clothes off Manneken Pis ten minutes BEFORE the deadline?
I did not even get to see it. So no picture again.
Little cheek was looking very proud of himself doing what he was supposed to do, completely as the Creator made him to be.

You see, it´s our Day of the Republic.
To celebrate, NATO representation organised a big reception yesterday. The ironic thing - a military institution of a post-soviet state calles everybody to celebrate the biggest national holiday on a date previously known as the Day of Soviet Army.

Now why would I feel obliged to explain you that I do not believe it to be anything more than coincidence?
Because my beloved friend was offended when I made this comment. She even explained me that it was not meant this way. Yes, she is a blond. And yes, she´s got a sense of humour. But everybody´s sense of humour has their blind spots.
And yes I already know I am culturally challenged because my StoneFlower story is not the original one. There is one in Greek mythology already. Sue me then.

Ok I did not get to go to the reception. I could go as somebody´s entourage, but I did not feel like. Instead I went to somewhere else. It was a good judgement, looking back. You see, there are times when the behaviour of even a woman of the most agreeable character (which I am not) becomes erratic (which is, in my case, like calling hurricane Rita a really strong wind). If I were a man, I´d been picking up a fight last night... nope, if I were a man I would not have these preprogrammed behaviourial irregularities - oops, thinking too much again.

I´ve just let my favourite blogger know about my new hobby. She noticed the name I had in my MSN today - collective dispute at the screw factory resolved - in fact, that´s a real news headline from last year. I wish I could give the same headline to last night´s, but I can´t.

My favourite bloggist - she´s perfect. She even liked the curry chicken I made being on the anxiety-combattting medicine. Yes dear THAT one. Sorry it was the only one I ever had - gives my blogspace name a new meaning :D Now I get to combat anxiety by meditation alone - and it´s much better!

Here is the ORIGINAL story

2006-02-24T07:28:00.000-08:00

... posted by another blogger ...

http://blog.teamego.com/archives/2005/10/post.html#more

me so culturally challenged... but I stick to my version for myself.
If you mind me posting this link, send a comment. I´ll find another link then

Stoneflower - an introduction

2006-02-24T05:24:00.000-08:00

There!

My tendency to overshare got bored with telephone lines, was feeling too shallow with colleagues, too tense in pubs, too risque in my friends´places, too lonely at home. Let`s see if we get comfortable here.

Today, I am posting my first entry - sorry, no portrait yet, since a) it´s not my darling laptop I´m currently using b) I do not have an USB cable with me to download this lovely pic of a camera-hog sheep I just took.

And no, I am not somewhere in the middle of Wales - I wish I were though :) I am in the heart of Europe. Yep. The city of Manneken-pis (mind you, I must see the guy before 4 pm - he´s wearing our national clothes today), Jeanneken-pis and a dog whose name I do not remember, but who does EXACTLY the same. Love this place. Love the smell, the look, the sound, the idiosincrazies... as someone once said, love is blind.

I chose to have my blog in English just because this is the only way to guarantee that wherever you are, you have the right keyboard. Shallow, eh?

But I digress. That was even more than a casual blog reader needs to know about my real life persona. Let´s get to this Stone Flower thing.

Russian literature. Even Soviet Russian literature is much better than most of the things that have been done in the "countries that make sense." There was this writer named Bazhov, or Bageove, or whatever transliteration you might wish to use. He wrote tales. Like fairy-tales, but about mining and miners at the Ural Mountains, the very edge of Europe. Supposed to be kids` tales, for kids who could handle people getting lost or losing their minds, or dying in this tales.

And there was this tale about the Stone Flower

If you can read Russian, the link is here:

http://www.skazka.com.ru/article/bagov/0000018bagov.html

I´ll tell you what is essential to understand my blog.

Master Daniel is one of those "different" people. They tried him for normal jobs, but he was really useless. He was thinking too much. A bit like me. But then he turned out to be a genious. a bit like me too, but in making beautiful things from stones, especially the nice green stone called malachite.

Of course, since the story takes place in 19th century Russia, he feels pushed into doing some kind of nonsense, commercial projects, that do not expose the full beauty the stone can hide and the Ural landscapes can offer.

When he finally gets a carte-blanche order with unlimited expenditure, he becomes even more depressed, because it`s much easier to criticise someone else´s design than to come up with your own idea. He cannot sleep or concentrate... His tutor thinks the guy needs to get la... sorry, married, it is a Soviet writer, guys. So they found a good girl and things are sort of in progress.

Finally, the Master learns about the mystical Copper Mount Lady who has a whole set of masters in slavery (pun intended) - and their works are living and breathing. Because they have seen the STONEFLOWER.

Of course there is a catch - once you´ve seen the stoneflower, you are not this world´s man anymore. Which means, our Master Daniel would not get this idea out of his head. He develo^ps a stoneflower´s fixation. A bit like me again.

He starts to make a cup out of stone according to a normal beautiful flower, and he even finds a perfect raw stone. When he´s done, everybody is amazed, it´s much better than anybody had ever seen... but of course our Master is still not satisfied, he still thinks the cup´s not perfect.
So he starts wandering off to the woods every day, and finally meets the Copper Mount Lady

he has a vision of her when she comes and asks,
Well, Master Daniel, your stone cup doesn´t come out
No, it does not :(((( the Master replies

of course there is this high-school version of this misenscene, the same dialogue, but the Master sits on the toilet.

stop laughing now

So the Master begs the lady to show her the Stone Flower - just to be able to make a perfect piece of art. She tries to talk him out of that, reminding of his old tutor, his fiancee - but he just would not listen. The thing is that once you have seen it, you are allowed to go, but you really can´t, everybody just came back to the Lady.

Finally he sees the whole thing. Frankly when I got to the decription of the Stone Flower, I was disappointed, it was nothing special. But maybe that was the whole point - something too big for words to describe.

The Master still get back to his house, but right after his engagement party he destroyed his previous work (the one everybody thought to be divine) and then he was gone.

Lost. The only thing the writer said that neither he died nor lost his mind, nor become her Copper Mount Majesty Slave. If you think you know what happened, leave me a comment.

And the whole story rings the bell with me. You see, some people just are like this - whatever response they get re: their personal and professional life, they remain restless, searching for the stoneflower, even they know that the stoneflower haven´t made anyone happy.

My stoneflower quest does not mean giving up on happyness. It´s just you heard it would destroy you, but you have a small doubt... that you can handle it, a suspicion... that it would make you complete.

Discuss ;)